CEOh-Snap! Storm Owners, RIM Says Your Device is teh Sux and it’s Your Fault for Buying It

Seriously, I’m beginning to heart RIM’s co-CEOs almost as much as I heart Steve Ballmer. Give the mobilemen a venue and a mic, and we get blog gold each and every time. Chronology will help context here: Mike Lazaridis on touch screen devices: THERE'S a reason that R.I.M. is averse to the iPhone's glass pad. [...]

Seriously, I’m beginning to heart RIM’s co-CEOs almost as much as I heart Steve Ballmer. Give the mobilemen a venue and a mic, and we get blog gold each and every time. Chronology will help context here:

Mike Lazaridis on touch screen devices:

THERE'S a reason that R.I.M. is averse to the iPhone's glass pad. “I couldn't type on it and I still can't type on it, and a lot of my friends can't type on it,” says Mike Lazaridis, R.I.M.'s co-chief executive and technological visionary. “It's hard to type on a piece of glass.”

This almost the very moment word leaked that RIM was set to release an “Apple Killer” which became the lamentably launched BlackBerry Storm. When reviewers and users alike generally panned the device’s initial, buggy software, Jim Balsillie said GlitchWare was the new Black(Berry):

[RIM and Verizon] made the crucial Black Friday deadline “by the skin of their teeth,” after missing a planned October debut. Mr. Balsillie said such scrambles — and the subsequent software glitches that need to be fixed — are part of the “new reality” of making complex cellphones in large volumes.

Now to put the disrespect cherry high atop of Storm owners frustration sundays, Lazaridis returns with this brain-boggler:

“That’s our first touch product, and you know nobody gets it perfect out the door. You know other companies were having problems with their first releases.”

The iPhone was Apple’s first touch product, and while iPhone 1.0 may have been limited in functionality (and 3.0 may still have boxes yet unchecked), it’s hard to take anyone seriously who doesn’t think Apple not only nailed their first touch product, but their very first phone product of any kind.

Maybe because 1) Apple wasn’t rushing for a Black Friday sales-focused deadline, 2) they weren’t trying to clone a competing device’s feature set, and 3) they cared about user experience more than 1) or 2)?

Many people still use an original iPhone 2G, some even still run iPhone OS 1.x. Storm owners have only themselves to blame for not waiting to buy Storm 2 instead? Ahem. Pitchforks to the right, torches to the left, north to Waterloo!

That said, if Dancing with the Canadian Stars ever becomes a reality, I would still vote for RIM’s co-CEO to take on the Woz role. Let the Laz dance! Ballmer could lend him the Monkey Boy choreography and we just know CrackBerry Kevin would bring out the push-powered voters!

(via Engadget, headline via Jeremy on Twitter)

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CEOh-Snap! Storm Owners, RIM Says Your Device is teh Sux and it’s Your Fault for Buying It

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